semantics

Yesterday, as I was ruing the fact that I hadn't worked out in days other than during my bike commute, and melting the butter for a truly wicked chocolate sheet cake (http://thepioneerwoman.com/cooking/2007/06/the_best_chocol/), I started to think about how difficult it is for me to be committed. Indeed, I would even argue that I fear commitment (see, e.g., male/female relationships of a personal nature). Thus, we see the repetitive cycles of my life - abandoned diets, short-lived exercise efforts and the like, and the accompanying whine of "it's too hard to commit."

Yet on the other hand, my life is overwhelmingly full of what I would term obsessive interests. For example, the devotion to crafts can be demonstrated with my persistence in finishing yet another row even though it's 3:00 a.m. and I have to go work the next day. Or, the need to continue making fantastical, really gorgeous baked desserts despite living by myself with only choco-allergic canines. And then there are the 16 (or 54, or 108) episode Korean drama marathons. All shining exemplars of obsession, which, it need be said, are not limited to extracurriculars. My type-A attention to detail regarding professional writing is also closely related to the obsession gene.

Commitment feels hard. In theory, it involves working against one's nature, diligence, and a stoic kind of Protestant work ethic. Obsession though, is easy in its involuntary, whimsical nature, as it is more akin to surrendering to the tide of your interests. Regardless, both involve immersion in an activity and true dedication. It's just that one is much more fun and feels infinitely easier, rather than a trial of patience.


So I'd like to say, screw commitment. Isn't it possible to reframe one's mind into productive obsession? Can't I become obsessed with exercise, and whole grains, and a more positive attitude towards work? I think it's worth a try. After all, it all depends on perspective.

blog delinquency, I banish thee!

A quick update:

1. As always, coming late to the party, I am now kind of totally obsessed with http://www.bakerella.com and http://thepioneerwoman.com.

2. I started a new job. Sigh.

3. I started trying to date again. Sigh part deux.

4. I am crocheting (!) a ginormous blanket for myself. My sister has already asked for one. Only through the magic of familial bonds and genetic recognition will I be willing to undertake this herculean task again for her.

5. I got a new adorable bike. I have, upon further consideration and a month of on-again-off-again contemplation, now named her. She is MolaMola, the Commuter Sunfish. Pictures to follow.

6. MolaMola is still in the process of being properly accessorized.

7. Yesterday, a true SF-bike folk asked me something in inexplicable biker code. Apparently my disguise is working. Also, now you too shall know that evidently there is some kind of group ride along the bay and through the city on Wednesday nights that involves drinking called the butter ride or the butter lap. See, this blog is educational too.

8. I made red velvet cake bombs (I cannot bear to name them cake balls because I am evidently quite puerile) this week and they have gone over exceedingly well. See #1.

9. I think I need a Jelly roll pan. Id.